All You Need Is A Good Idea!

331,002,651

 

Let’ say the population of America is about 330 million. Of which there are around 2 million marriages a year. Which is about 166,000 marriages a month. Of those, about 25% met online, which is 41,500. Of those, about 35% created a unique wedding hashtag. Which means 14,525 have serious internet savvy. Of those, around 95% will have the father of the bride pay for much of the costs of the wedding. So,  13,799 won’t dare poke fun at the person paying for so much.

Which leaves 726 possible potential purchasers of my book, I Have to Pay for the Damn Flowers? A heads up for the Father of the bride on how you are about to get really screwed. (And a few things you can do about it.) New! Covid-19 Edition.

Of those 726 possibilities, about half will have a virtual wedding. And of those 363, about half have an Amazon account. Sadly, of those 182 remaining, 99% have never heard of my blog.

So for the one or two of you left, thank you, enjoy the book and have a wonderful wedding.

CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE

 

Sorry to keep you waiting

 

 

A while ago I published a humorous book that warned the father of the bride of all the financial grief he was about to experience.

But the joke was on me.

Turns out, due to the pandemic, very few couples were getting married, so they had no need for any wedding insights, serious or funny.

But my eldest daughter recently announced her engagement and planned on having a virtual wedding. My delight was matched only by my excitement at recognizing that I could come out with a Covid-19 edition of my book.

Which I have now done. The title is: I Have to Pay for the Damn Flowers? A heads up for the Father of the Bride on how you are about to get really screwed. (And a few things you can do about it.) New! Covid-19 Edition

It is, like everything else in the world, available on Amazon. And, as it states on the back cover: “While virtual shouldn’t mean additional expenditures for you, this is not a bet I would care to take.”

If you need a gift for the Father of the Bride, have been the FOB, will be the FOB, if you are on the groom’s side, the bride’s side, part of the wedding party, engaged, or if you simply like to laugh out loud, then check out I Have To Pay For The Damn Flowers?

And if you need additional encouragement to spring for a big $9.99, Alan Zweibel, an original SNL writer, best-selling author and father of two brides was kind enough to say: “It’s great. Funny, smart and relatable.”

(Alan has actually said many kind things, but this was the only relevant one.)

This is not a blog

 

As I was preparing to write today’s blog, my wife told me that people have more important things to do than read blogs. Even mine. I was surprised to hear this, but I realized that she-who-must-be-obeyed is correct.

I will see how I feel about all this next week.

Stay healthy.

LAUGHING HELPS

 

RANDOM THOUGHTS

Today’s post came from a Wall Street Journal column that quoted financial planner Allan Roth. He suggests, “Humans can’t think randomly. Once people think of Exxon Mobil, they’re a lot more likely to think of Chevron or another oil stock. For a lot of investors, diversification is like doing a word-association game.”

That is often the same problem we have when attempting to generate a cluster of good ideas. Once you have one idea, it is often difficult to leave that same basic area and come up with different approaches. Sure, it’s natural and helpful to come up with different versions, in an attempt to sharpen the thought. But putting all your eggs in one creative basket drastically restricts your idea generation. You should be looking for more than just a variation on a theme.

So take a walk, a nap, a shower. Kick some ideas around with people you trust. Look at blogs, ads, commercials… relevant and not. Visit YouTube. Buy one of my books. Bounce around different websites. And most important, have fun.

NOTE: Why, during these dreadful times, am I bothering to post a blog? My first instinct was the hell with doing it. But I decided in favor of posting for one reason: normalcy. Since so much is changing so quickly, I just felt a little bit of staying with my customary routine might help lessen my unease. And you may decide to read it for the same reason.

BECAUSE WE NEED A GOOD LAUGH

 

A good sign

A toy store in my neighborhood has recently closed. That is not too surprising; there are many “For Rent” signs around the city. (In my neighborhood alone, we have lost, among others, Bolton’s, Laytners, Papryus, Glaser’ Bakery, Panera Bread and Elk Candy.)

But the sign this toy store placed in its window was an unexpected and generous gesture. Right next to their “Going out of business” announcement, they suggested people should continue to support small businesses and visit a former competitor for their toy and gift needs.

Now, I do not know if there was any quid pro quo, or if Mary Arnold Toys has any kind of financial relationship with Fantastic Kids. But I choose to believe it was simply a surprisingly thoughtful act.

And in today’s polarizing atmosphere, doubly appreciated.

BUY NOW. CLICK HERE

 

10 Tips. 5 Secrets. 9 Essential tools

 

 

I frequently follow fellow marketing bloggers on Twitter, many of whom have more followers than the total amount of people I have ever met in my life. And I never fail to notice the similarity of the headlines that many of them write, featuring numbers of things: 8 Tips, 12 Tools, 5 Facts, 9 How Tos, The Best 6, 12 Warning signs and so on. I figure it must be working for them, or why would they continue to use that particular technique?

As much as I admire their talent in coming up with those headlines, it is a skill I am sadly lacking. They seem formulaic, but you can’t really argue with success. (Well, you can, but that is the subject for a different blog.) I prefer going for what I consider clever, intriguing, offbeat and witty, with the hope that I can capture attention the same way a well-crafted headline will.

But we will soon have empirical, though scanty, evidence. If this post gets markedly more readers than usual, then perhaps I have finally discovered the secret of writing blog headlines. And I can think of 7 reasons and 6 insights as to why I would then switch my writing style.

Got the idea?

The perfect gift. And large type, too

 

The cilantro lesson

So there you are, at a table for four in a Mexican restaurant. And in a fancy touch, the guacamole is going to be prepared tableside. The server asks, “how spicy would you like it?” And everyone, at the same moment, says, “Very spicy.” “Mild.” “Medium.” “Slightly hot.”

You manage to get through this culinary crisis. The vote for mild wins, as everyone realizes they can add more hot sauce to their own portion.

But then comes the cilantro question: to add, or not to add. Here the decision is more difficult, because people are never neutral about cilantro. The waiter can’t just put in a little bit, since those who hate it won’t accept even a subtle suggestion of its presence.

While those at the table are trying to accommodate each other, let me tie this into a discussion about good ideas. Many years ago, someone I was working at came up with a list of topics for his talk. The one that I still remember feeds right off the tableside guacamole question. “Compromise is the father of schlock.”

If you modify an ad to accommodate a client request, you run the very real risk of adding the equivalent of cilantro. Just a little bit can really hurt the end result. The client may prefer the new flavor, but many people will now find it distasteful. If you strongly believe it will change the ad in a negative way, it is up to you to stand as firm as you can. Sure, the client will always win on a technicality—they are the client. But you are getting paid to produce the best work that you can, and that includes letting your client know when you think he is making a mistake.

You will eventually do what the client wants. He hired you, is paying you and you would like to work with him again. But he will certainly respect you more if you let him know when you disagree. Especially if you are right.

Got the idea?

Great gift. (Large type!)

 

Scaredy cat

 

All of us get nervous when talking in front of a group. It’s basically a form of stage fright. And yes, it depends on the size of the group, your subject matter, and your experience. But stage fright is a fascinating topic—Barbra Streisand, Laurence Olivier, Adele and Pablo Casals are among many who suffer from it.

You don’t have to be a famous performer to get the jitters. It just takes presenting a campaign to one important, impatient client to bring on the dry throat and sweaty palms.

Two researchers at the University of Nebraska-Omaha, Karen Dwyer and Marlina Davidson, once administered a survey to eight hundred and fifteen college students, asking them to select their three greatest fears from a list that included, among other things, heights, flying, financial problems, deep water, death, and “speaking before a group.” Speaking before a group beat out all the others, even death.

We all know ways to minimize the problem. To me, the most effective is to really practice—and practice, and practice—your pitch. But you will still always be concerned about things like the questions that might be asked that you may not know the answers to.

Some performers use beta-blockers to calm their nerves. Some say that the added adrenaline helps them do better. Others do mental or physical exercises. But perhaps just simply realizing how many of us are affected by it can help you bring your fears under control. And it’s good to remember how few in the audience are really listening after the first few minutes.

Got the idea?

 

MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

 

Don’t hide the menu

A boat ride is a nice idea, especially on a hot summer day. A boat that takes you on a 45-minute trip on the Hudson, leaving from a midtown pier in Manhattan. The ride itself is free, a nice touch, since they serve food and alcohol and hope to make their money that way.

We tried it on a weekday, last summer, since we (correctly) believed it would be less crowded. Weather ideal, boat not crowded, food fine. So why am I telling you all this, since, after all, this is a marketing blog?

Because of that old problem: customer service. When I had checked out the boat ride online, I was delighted to see that they had a lunch combo special, weekdays, available between 11:30 and 3:30. But that when I got onboard, and we decided to have something to eat, the lunch combo menu was literally nowhere to be found. The server had never heard of it, and when I went to the bar inside, the bartender looked all around and said she would have to go downstairs to see if she could find the menu.

I came back ten minutes later and was presented with the lunch special menu she had located. We ordered, ate, and it was ample and tasty. But (unintentional bad pun alert) it did leave a bad taste in my mouth.

If you decide to have special, reduced price offerings to attract customers, don’t make it a game of hide and seek to locate them. At best, it reeks of “bait and switch.” If you don’t want people to order the specials, perhaps because the margins are too thin, then don’t offer it. Or shorten the hours it is available. Or whatever.

But the smartest thing to do is proudly present the list of specials along with the regular menu. Because nothing will disgruntle (has anyone ever just been “gruntled”?) a customer more than finding out, after they have eaten, what they could have ordered. And this is true for any discounts you may be offering, whether you are serving food, selling paint or shredding hard drives.

Got the idea?

MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY

 

Why you should nudge your marketing

Here’s what the New York Times reported: Vendors were given a slightly different version of the form they used to report rebates that they owe the government. The result was that companies acknowledged they owed an extra $1.59 million in rebates. Yet the only difference was that the signature box came at the beginning, rather than the end of the forms.

Apparently, this happened because promising at the outset to be truthful actually caused people to answer more truthfully.

This was pointed out as an early success of an effort to apply academic research to the business of running the government. And left me wondering how we might apply this type of academic research to the business of running a business. Specifically, what small steps can we take to increase blog readership, coupon redemption, Google ads, and so on?

What simple changes might make our advertising more effective? Is it a straightforward readjustment of the text? Moving the slogan to the top of the page? A larger/smaller headline? These may only lead to modest improvements but, as the article points out, there are only modest costs involved, since nudges are cheap.

Got the idea?

 

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